The Old Friend, Angie,
Harry and the Nude Videos
Angie frantically rushed to her computer one
day and desperately contacted Paul. Beam me up Scotty - er Pauly! she demanded
Paul kindly did so and regarded her curiously
as she flopped on the floor of the good ship Explorer. "Have you been in
a fight?" he asked kindly
Angie glowered at him crossly "I havent had a
shower yet " she snapped crossly. " I need to use your shower - do you
have such a thing here?"
"YES MY DARLING"
Angie hugged pauly with relief
He held her gingerly at arms length -"when exactly
did you last have a shower?"
Angie glared at him again - she was extremely
prone to moood swings; "Well where is it then!" she hissed in irritation.
Pauly quickly ushered her to the shower and with a great show of being
a good host supplied her with a towel and soap
Angie was heard singing in the shower for a long
long time. Everyone started to get a bit cross - how long could the hot
water hold out? And what was capable of drowning out that noise!!!?
Eventually she did reappear where Paul, Ethan
and Carla stood on the flight deck. She was Very fresh and squeaky clean
she arranged herself on the sofa in a bathrobe and toweled her hair. She
smiled serenely. " Thank you so very much" she began... "I cant begin
to tell you how much that meant to me... try to imagine how wonderful it
was to have a shower without little hands and feet hammering on the door
and a chorus of dear little voices piping "MUMMMY mummy mummmy mummmy
mummmmmmmmmmmmy the entire time!!!"
"But that's a lie Angie," smiled Ethan,
"I was doing it for fun, didn't you hear me?"
Angie considered him thoughtfully.... "I was
singing" she replied eventually
"OF course!" Ethan laughed, "You know, you could
record a song with that voice!"
"Oh!" Angie blushed a little with pleasure...(maybe
Ethan wasnt so bad after all - no-one had EVER complimented her singing
before!!!!)
Carla looked up, "Hey... I have some instruments
and stuff in my room... would u like to give recording a song a go?"
Angie became very shy and flustered and started
making lots of excuses; Like "i think I just saw Death walk past the window"
and other really convincing things
"Nonsense!" Ethan smiled.
"Maybe she needs incentive?"" Paul asked.
"Like what?" asked Carla.
AT THAT MOMENT, THE FACE OF
THE OLD FRIEND APPEARED ON SCREEN.
"HI GUYS HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHH WHAT'S HAPPENING?"
"Oh no Angie, it's our old friend. We hate the
old friend he is annoying and laughs a lot!" said Paul.
"Yeah," Ethan said, "Let's concentrate on your
record!"
"RECORD! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!" laughed The Old
Friend, "SHE DOESN'T LOOK CAPABLE!"
Angie picked up a handy pitchfork and threatened
The Old Friend which wasnt terribly effective as he was too far away for
her to reach
"Tell ya what," said THE OF, "IF YOU FUNNY WOMAN
CAN MAKE A RECORD, I will give you 400000000000000 gold pieces!"
Angie dropped the pitchfork and tried to count
that high on her fingers - it sounded like an awful lot of gold. "I sing
in the shower...." Angie offered irrelevantly at last. Recovering a little
she peered at TOF "hey! she challenged " dont I know You!!!!!"
The OF laughed; "No Angie, but I know you! THE
DEAL IS DONE! Produce a record, and the money is yours. If not..... well
it's simple. I have taped your shower performances; and if you fail; I
will transmit them to the entire galaxy so you will be humillated forever.
BWAHAHAHAHAHHA, BWAHAHAHAHAH!" he laughed and ended the hail as he vanished
from the screen.
"Hmmmmmmm" Angie considered this for a while
" Im sure I know him from somewhere " she muttered " dont you just hate
that feeling!...Wellll as to the humiliation - Pah! as if I care if he
transmits my shower power to the universe - any old person outside the
bathroom can listen to my singing - I just dont CARE! ..however
as a direct challenge has been made ...and there is money involved... and
everyone will hear me anyway - lets have some fun!"
"That just gave me an idea.... any one outside
the window? Have you ever had any peeping Toms in the area you knew of?"
asked Paul, "Hmm.. how else would the OF have got videos of you in the
shower singing?"
"OMG" shrieked Angie "Videos!!!!!! I thought
he had taped them on cassettes. Now i am dying!" she collapsed on the floor.
Carla picked Angie off the floor, "Someone you
know must be selling them! Who has been in your house recently?"
"Kenny! the bastard!" shrieked Angie before fainting
again
Ethan looked at Angie, "I doubt it would be her
husband. Perhaps their is some great mystery to all this!"
Angie who had actually fully recovered pretended
not to have recovered at all so she could hear what everyone else had to
say - in the meantime she tried to remember who The OF reminded her of...
*~*~*
MANY YEARS AGO...
The rebellious Angie strummed around year 10 looking
cool.
"Who is that cute little kiddie" she asked
pointing with her cigarette
"That is Pauly" replied someone who knew everything
"My he is very young isnt he - kindergarten?"
"Who cares?" said the person who knew everything,
her name was Sandy, "Mrs BITCHFACE is our teacher again. I hate her...
she doesn't make sewing interesting. Apparently we are getting a new boy
today!"
"Oh goody! " exclaimed angie enthusiastically
- she liked anything that had to do with boys. Preferably those a bit older
than herself who were old enough to drive and who had lots of money and
who were dumb enough to spend it all on her!
"You just clear off Sandy" Angie suggested
helpfully - for she wanted to ensure she had first look at this new boy.
Sandy was too pretty for her own good anyway - plus knowing everything
- she was pretty annoying. Angie stubbed out her cigarette on Sandys nose
and Sandy raan away howling
Suddenly, the most SEXIEST PERSON SHE EVER
SAW IN HER WHOLE LIFE WALKED UP THE STAIRS.
"Hi!" he said, "I'm new here... can you tell
me where to go?"
checking that she wasnt looking in the mirror
, momentarily confused for previously she had always been the sexiest person
she had ever seen in her whole life; Angie smiled seductively and draped
herself around a convenient pole. " Oh I certainly can" she purred (considering
drawing him a map leading straight to her bedroom). " Where would you like
to go first ?" She murmered suggestively...moving very very close to the
gorgeous hunk.
'Your bedroom would be a good start' he thought;
"Umm well I'm in swimming class apparently. But I don't know where to get
the bathing suits from... and I'm not sure what type to get, shorts or
speedos? Is there anything that all the other guys usually wear? I don't
want to rock up wearing one and everyone else wears another..."
'Or wearing none would be good Angie thought
happily " Well..." she whispered (she only had to whisper as by now she
was actually draped over the love interest; "welll,,,,, come with me and
I'll help you ummmmm, try on a few pairs I can tell you which ones look
best....."
"Sure!" he smiled, "I'm Harry by the way,
Harry Knowels!"
"Harrryyyyyyyyy...mmmmmmm what a great name
- its like a mating growel of a love stuck lioness, dont you think?" Angie
who had no shame at all took a firm grasp of Harry and led him away
*~*~*
MEANWHILE back in the present, "ANGIE? ANGIE?" Paul
cried.
"OHHHHHHHHHHHHH," Angie jumped with shock and
rubbed her ear "what are you screeching in my ear for!" she demanded crossly
"We were talking to you; but you didn't seem
to be listening?" Ethan said, "We're you having a flashback?"
Angie blushed furiously and tried to hid ethe
fact by scrabbling around on the floor for an earing she pretneded she
had lost. " But your earrings are in your ears!" Paul pointed out
helpfully. "Then it must be my damn contact lens that im looking for mustn't
it!" snapped Angie
"I think it's obvious she had a flashback," smiled
Carla, "Did it give you any insight into where you've seen The Old Friend
before?"
"Umm... not sure..." Angie said with a sigh.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The crew were all in a meeting room.
"I am not impressed!" Gemini said, "The Old Friend
was dead, and now he is back to life. And free to roam and talk to us.
Why does he persist on talking to us. I hate the old friend!"
Everyone blinked for a while.
"Angie seems to know him from somewhere!" said
Ethan.
"Really?" asked Malia.
"Funny, I had flashbacks to highschool!" Angie
said, "Maybe I remember him from there?"
"It still doesn't answer the question of how
the Old Friend got your videos!" Paul said.
"Maybe he stole them!" Carla suggested.
"No that can't be right!" said Angie, "I live
in a mansion now remember? It's impenetrable!"
"Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm!" said Blake.
"What?" asked Angie.
"We must explore the mansion!" said Blake.
"I think so!" Ethan said, "I'm already on it.
Gem, wanna go undercover with me?"
Gem looked a bit out of it, "Huh?"
"I need someone whose minds going to be on the
job!" Ethan said, "Blake, Malia.. come with me to the mansion. We'll see
whose been taping Angie nude!"
The three walked off.
"Well!" smiled Angie, "I feel better knowing
three almost strangers will be going through my house!"
"You won't have time for that!" smiled Paul.
"No!" said Carla, "We are going to help you record
your album!"
Angie blinked.
*~*~*
"NOW!" Pat said, "I am going to demonstrate how to
increase the loudness in one's voice!"
Angie was standing in the V.R machine with Pat
wearing convict clothes.
"Allright. Ms. 4356 can you sing high?" asked
Pat.
"Is that me?" asked Angie.
"YES!"
"Sorry Paul's mum!" Angie said, "LAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!"
"Now!" said Pat, "Let us experiment! We shall
make gorgeous men sing high and see if we can match their tones. Computer,
give me a gorgeous man... nude!"
A naked gorgeous man appeared.
"WELL!" smiled Angie.
Pat punched the naked man in the groin, "ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"
"NOW!" smiled Pat, "Match it!"
"LAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!"
PUNCH
"ARHGHGHGHGHGHGHG!"
"LALALALALALALALALA!"
PUNCH
"ARGGHGHGHGH!"
"LALLALALALAL!"
PUNCH
ETC.
*~*~*
Blake, Ethan and Malia were in the dining room were
in the dining room at the huggge mansion. Angie's family had been sent
to a hotel until they could get to the bottom of the situation.
"What a lovely mansion we helped build!" smiled
Blake.
"It is!" said Malia.
"Now, let's go through the list of suspects.
The maid, the cook, the butler! Well that's just great! What sterotypical
and cliched suspects!" Ethan smiled.
"The maid, Yvette Monsiur the french slutty type,"
Blake said, "The cook, Biddy Bodo the ex-African slave woman, or the butler,
the tall imposing Mr. Javes!"
"We should observe them carefully, and see which
one is capable of recording the mistress of the house taking her shower
and selling the tapes to The Old Friend!" Malia said.
"Yeah, and try discover if The Old Friend is
the only one our suspect sold the tapes to. After all, they might have
been sold to more than one person... in which case, Angie won't be too
pleased!" Ethan grinned.
"DINNER IS SERVED!" Yvette yelled, walking
in as the cook served the food up.
"Thankyou servant types!" smiled Ethan.
"I am noones servant. I do this because I am
paid too. A measley wage might I add!" The cook said, "Eat your food or
not, I don't care. YOU aren't the ones PAYING ME!!!!!!!!!!!!" she
slammed the food down and stormed off.
"Er.. you must forgive Mammouselle Bodo, she
'iz not like ov-eer peoplez. She iz 'ow you say, abrupt!" Yvette said.
"Oh we'll forgive her. As far as we can THROW
HER!" laughed Ethan.
"No Ethan!" said Malia, "Don't joke about the
fat African Savage!"
The three burst out laughing, and Yvette laughed
to, "She iz a little 'ow you say, plump!"
Everyone laughed and laughed as Biddy watched
evily holding a real sharp knife.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
"NOW!" smiled Max as he and Jack were teaching Angie
how to use her hands sufficiently to strum a guitar, "Since we will be
singing the blues it is imperitave that you know the tune... do-do-do-do-do
. da-da-da-da. do-do-do-do-do. da.da.da.da!"
"OK!"
"I shall sing. You play!" Max smiled.
"Yes!" said Jack, as he stretched himself to
long proportions and spun his bits through a guitar, "Now you strum me
when your ready to start!"
"OK ready?" Max asked.
"YEP!" smiled Angie, starting to strum away...
Max started to sing to the blues....
'I'm just a little cat
do - do - do - do
So how about that?
do - do - do - do
You know I'm the fucking best
do - do - do - do
and I'm certainly not a pest
do - do - do - do
there's nothing I'd rather be
do - do - do - do
than a brilliant cat like me
do - do - do - do'
"WONDERFUL STRUMMING ANGIE!" smiled Max.
Jack oozed back to his wormy self and clapped
for a bit, "That was JUSSSsssssssssssst fantastic!!!!!!"
Angie grinned.
*~*~*
Angie was smiling as she walked down the hallway
and bumped into the ghost.
"Hi!" Ghost smiled, "How are you?"
"Oh my god you are a ghost!" Angie said.
"That's right. I'm a dead girl. But I'm a friend
of these people, it's allright!"
"Oh! Well what's your name?"
"I'm Ghost! Original huh? So who are you?"
"Angie!"
"OHHH right! The signing girl!" smiled Ghost.
"Yes. I'm doing very well. Pat, Max and Jack
have trained me up, and now I'm going to record a single with Carla and
Paul. We'll show that good for nothing Old Friend!"
"Good luck with it all!" Ghost smiled.
"Thanks!" Angie said, and Ghost floated through
a wall that scared the shit out of her but she continued on her way.......
......
*~*~*
MANY YEARS AGO...
Angie smiled as she and Harry walked out the office,
"Oh it's a good thing I bought the speedos if you say every other guy is
wearing them!"
"Oh I'm sure they are!" Angie smiled.
"I'll meet you at the pool?" Harry asked.
"Sure!" smiled Angie, and as he walked to
the change-rooms she looked at his butt in his tight school pants and smiled.
*~*~*
"Where've you been?" Sandy smiled, now in a little
bikini.
"Sorry!" Angie said running over in a bikini,
"I was a little occupied!"
"Yeah? What by?"
"Harry Knowles his name is!" Angie smiled,
"Wait till you check him out. I helped him buy his swim costume. Speedos!"
"Oh your bad!" Sandy said, "Why did he agree
to wear them?"
"I told him all the guys here are wearing
them!" Angie grinned.
Suddenly, from the male changerooms out stepped
Harry in a pair of tiny speedos with the school logo on the butt.
"Oh gross!" one of the guys yelled.
Harry noticed that all the other guys were
wearing shorts.
"Dude, you are sooo new aren't you?" one of
the guys said.
"So lame!" laughed another guy, "New to the
school and your wearing THAT?"
"He's got a death wish!" laughed another.
They picked on him for the rest of the lesson
and he gave Angie death daggers.
"Oh the poor guy!" Angie said.
"Good one Angie!" Sandy sighed.
*~*~*
"ANGIE?" Paul screamed, standing there with Carla.
"Oh.. sorry!" Angie said.
"You were just standing in the hallway like a
mindless zombie.... were you having another flashback?" Carla asked.
"Umm yeah kinda..." Angie said.
"Any new leads to how you know the Old Friend?"
Paul asked.
Angie shook her head, "No..... I just can't figure
it out!" she sighed.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Malia was tucked up into bed in the HUGE mansion
and she rang her little bell that called the butler. Mr Javes looking tall
and imposing stepped in;
"Yeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeees?"
"Hi. I'm Malia. Well you know that. But what
I was wondering Mr. Javes is, could you be a darling and .. well I don't
know. Tuck me in?"
"You look well tucked in mamme, but if you insist!"
Javes said, walking over and starting to tuck her in.
"Oh could you pull the sheets back a bit, they
are annoying me slightly!" smiled Malia.
Javes pulled the sheets back and Malia's breasts
were exposed.
"Oh my breasts!" Malia giggled like a schoolgirl,
"Let me just cover them up, that's very naughty of me I'm sorry. I wouldn't
want for anyone to see me naked! Imagine if it got out on video!"
"That would be terrible!" Javes said.
"Awful!" Malia smiled.
"Yes. Anything else m'ilady?"
"Well... I am kind of warm. Can I have a fan
on?" Malia asked.
"Wouldn't you much rather take your sheets off?
You have ten blankets!" Javes said.
"Oh your right. Well no. I'm fine!" Malia smiled.
"Goodnight m'ilady!" Javes sighed, thinking this
girl was an idiot and shutting her door behind him.
Malia grabbed a hand held radio and started to
through it.
*~*~*
Ethan and Blake were in what looked like a child's
room and were playing with the toys when their hand held radio started
crackling.
Blake grabbed it, "Go ahead Malia!"
"I'm not having any luck with Javes!" said Malia,
"He shows no interest in me, let alone taking videos of my naked wet body!"
"Neither do I!" Ethan smiled, "Maybe Javes is
gay too!"
"Shh!" Blake said, "Someone is coming!"
Suddenly Yvette's scream was heard from
the kitchen.
"OH MY GOD!!!!" Ethan cried, as he and Blake
ran off, dropping the radio.
"GUYS?" went Malia's voice on the radio, "GUYS?....
OH MY GOD! HELP! GUYYS!! ARHGHGHGHGH!"
*~*~*
Blake and Ethan ran into the kitchen.....
"Oh my GOD!" Blake said.
Yvette lay on the floor dead with a carving knife
through her back.
"That is pure revulsion!" said Ethan, "I've seen
enough death in my time!"
"Well I don't think it's over yet. This is after
all Other Than Earth, we see many deaths. Some humourous! Some not.
I think this one is somewhere in the WE DONT CARE SHE'S A SUPPORTING CHARACTER
ANYWAY field!" Blake smiled.
"That's right, she only died to service the plot
and she is doing that very well!" smiled Ethan.
"Who is the killer?" Blake asked, "I reckon it's
that African savage!"
"What's her motive?" asked Ethan.
"Beauty. She's jealous of Yvette's feminine appeal!"
Blake said.
"Right, it could be the savage. But... Biddy
is dead!" Ethan pointed to Biddy the poor African cook gutted on the kitchen
bench and laid to roast on the gas oven.
"THE KILLER IS JAVES!" squealed Ethan, "IT MUST
BE JAVES!"
"IT MUST! THEN EXPLAIN THAT!" Blake yelled pointing
at Javes' severed head on the table in a bowl of pumpkin soup.
"Ummm.. killer Malia?" Ethan suggested.
"NO! Someone has killed these nice people. But
*WHO* else would have access into the house? Angie's family is locked away
in a hotel? The cook, the butler and the maid are all dead?"
"I don't know, but what do you think the killer
is after!" Ethan asked.
"The mistress of the house!" said Blake.
"Right, but Angie is safe on our ship!" Ethan
said.
"MALIA!" they both squealed running to the master
bedroom and seeing.............
"SHE'S GONE!" they yelled.
*~*~*
"This is hopeless!" said Angie, "I just can't concentrate
on this song!"
"Nonsense!" Paul smiled, "Keep trying!"
"Yeah... come on, me and Paul will play, you
sing!" Carla said.
"I CAN'T! My mind is occupied. I keep having
flashabacks, I know this OLD FRIEND from somewhere but WHERE DO I KNOW
YOU FROM DAMMNIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Angie squealed.
Then collapsed.
Paul checked her pulse, "She's...................................
ALIVE!"
"WHOOHOO!" smiled Carla screaming loudly with
excitment.
Angie's eyes opened quickly and she slapped Carla,
"Your loud screaming hurt my ears!"
"Sorry!" Carla smiled.
"Well I give up!" Angie said, picking up the
guitars and amps and microphones and smashing them into nothingness, "I
just can't go on, I feel like I'm going out of my mind!!!!!!!!!!!!! I JUST
NEED TO GO HOME AND REST!!!!!!!"
"NO!" said Paul, "NO REST! You will keep going
(once we get new equipment) and we will finish the song. We won't have
those tapes played to the public by the Old Friend!"
"Yeah Angie!" Carla said........ "Angie?"
*~*~*
MANY YEARS AGO...
Harry stood dripping wet in his tiny speedos by
the side of the pool trying to cover himself up as everyone was laughing.
Angie walked up to him and looked apologetic.
"I'm real sorry Harry!" she said, "I just..
well I just wanted an excuse to see you nearly naked!"
"At a new school, on my first day, you humilliate
me like this?" Harry said, "Thanks Angie!"
"I'm sorry Harry, truley... why don't you
go in and get dry. We'll try to forget this!"
"Everyone thinks I'm a loser, and they've
all said stuff about my.... well look, just leave it alone. You've done
enough damage don't you think?" Harry said, storming off to the change-room.
Angie sighed.
*~*~*
"ANGIE?" Carla yelled.
"Yeah?" Angie said.
"RECORDING!" Paul yelled.
Blake and Ethan ran down the hallway.
"Umm aren't you supposed to be in my mansion?"
asked Angie.
"We were!" said Ethan.
"So was Malia. But she's gone!" Blake said.
"Gone? Gone where?" asked Paul.
"Missing!" said Ethan, "Presumed dead!"
Everyone looked shocked.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
An urgent crew meeting was in progress.
"Where is she?" asked Gemini.
"No scans have detected her whatsoever!" Ghost
said.
"I've analysed the blood found in the bedroom,"
Max said, "Definatley Malia's!"
"This is awful, who would brutally murder my
cook, maid and butler and then kidnap Malia?" Angie asked.
Jack the worm smiled at her, "You might need
councelling after today my dear!"
"Now is no time for therapy," Carla snapped.
"She's right!" Ethan said, "We have to find our
kidnapped friend!"
"It would help if she would stop getting kidnapped
all the time!" Blake said.
"I concur!" Gemini smiled.
"Oh where oh where could Malia be?" asked Pat.
"We'll keep up the scans, put them to 600%, I
want her found!" Paul said like a captain.
*~*~*
It was dark where Malia was.......... she was bouncing
around.. she realised she was in a box of some type being moved. She heard
faint voices.
"Do you have her?" came a voice.
"I did as you asked. I slaughtered all those
around her and brought her to you!"
"Good, good, good! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAAHHAHAAHHAAHAHAHAHA AHAHAHAHHAHAAHAHAH..
umm now OPEN, HAHAHAH the BOX!!!!!!"
The box was opened and the bound and gagged Malia
saw.......... THE OLD FRIEND!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOO YOU FOOL!!!!!!!!!" the Old Friend
yelled, "This isn't the person I WANTED! THAT ISN'T ANGIE! BWHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!"
"Listen mate. I'm a hitman. When you say to me
get the girl in the master bedroom, that's what I do! And I did. So I want
my payment!"
"SURE!" laughed the Old Friend handing a few
hundered dollars and the hitman left the series, "You will do Explorer
girl!
You will be a fine example to Angie!"
Malia looked a bit worried.
*~*~*
Paul, Angie and Carla stood on the bridge pacing
when beeping enemated from Ethan's console.
"What is it?" asked Carla.
"Ship approaching... fast!" Ethan said.
"It's raising it's weapons!" Gemini added.
"It's the Old Friend's ship!" Pat said.
"The Old Friend? What's he doing back?" asked
Angie.
"Now isn't a good time for him, we've got to
find Malia!" Paul said.
"Hailing him...." Ghost said, "No wait.... he's
hailing us!"
"Oh let's get this over with!" Carla sighed.
The Old Friend's face appeared on screen laughing
manically, "HAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHA
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHHAAHAHAHAH
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH
HAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAH!"
"OLD FRIEND SHUT UP!" Carla yelled.
"Sorry!" The OF smiled.
"We have no time for this!" said Ethan.
"He's right!" Angie said, "I havn't produced
your record. Show the world my nudity if you want, I don't care! One of
these kid's friends is missing and I am going to help them find her!"
"BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH! THERE ARE NO SHOWER TAPES
YOU STUPID COW, HAHAHAHAHAHAH
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHHAAHAHAHAHA
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHHAAHHAAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAAHHAHAAHHAHAAHAHAHAHHA!"
"OLD FRIEND, THAT ISN'T FUNNY!" Pat yelled, "You
fabricated the whole story? NOT FUNNY!"
"Oh but my dear Patty Cakes, it had a reason!"
The OF laughed.
"What?" Angie asked.
"To torment you. Just the beginning!" The OF
laughed.
"Why torment Angie?" asked Blake.
"Yeah, you don't even know her!" Ghost yelled.
"Ahh but I do. Surley Angie, surley you remember
your school days! Do you remember a chap by the name of HARRY KNOWLES!!!!!!!!!!
BWHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!"
"Yes.... Harry....." Angie sighed, "Such a beauty.
I ruined my chances with that one!"
"Well...... you see my darling ANGIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE.
HARRY WAS.......... ME!"
"ARHGHGHGHGHGHGHGHGHGHGHGHGHGGHHGHGHGHG!" screamed
Angie.
"Wait I havn't finished, he was me older brother!"
The OF said.
"Oh.!" said Angie
"I am lost!" said Ethan.
"Let me try to explain..........." said The Old
Friend, but Angie's mind was elsewhere................
*~*~*
MANY YEARS AGO...
Harry was walking home from school now when all
of a sudden a car pulled up and five guys from school got out.
"Where you going Harry?" one of them smiled.
"Umm... Home!" Harry said, as he kept on walking.
"Why don't you slow down!" one of the guys
smiled.
"Yeah!" grinned another.
Harry kept walking.
"I don't think he heard me boys!" smiled the
other one.
"Why don't you guys piss off!" yelled Angie
walking up with a shotgun she had got out her father's shed.
"SHIT!" the guys screamed getting in their
car and pissing off.
"...thanks!" Harry muttered.
"I just came to apologise. About everything
that happened today!"
"No problem!" Harry said, "I'm moving to another
school anyway!"
"You don't have to do that!" said Angie.
"I think it's best. Don't you!?" Harry said.
"Probably!" Angie sighed.
"Oh well. I wish we could have met... under
better circumstances!"
"Sure!" Angie sighed, watching Harry walk
out of her life forever.
*~*~*
"Well that's not such a gut-wrenching ending!" Paul
said of Angie's flashback.
"YEAH!" Carla moaned, "Why are you trying to
wreck Angie's life because of *THAT*?"
"What you didn't know," said The Old Friend,
"Is that when he walked home that night he fell down an open manhole and
DIED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! MY BROTHER HARRY DIED THANKS TO YOU!!!!!!!!!"
"Oh I'm sorry but I don't see how that is my
fault!" Angie said.
"Yeah it's not like she pushed him!" Ethan said.
"GOD!" screamed Gem, "ARE YOU THAT THICK? WHY
BLAME ANGIE FOR YOUR BROTHERS CLUMSINESS?"
"Oh!" said The Old Friend, "Well I guess your
right!" and Malia was beamed back into the flight-deck, "Sorry about the
misunderstanding, and all your dead servants!"
"Umm fine I guess!" Angie said.
The Old Friend closed his hail and flew off at
maximum speeds.
"Are you telling me that the murders, the singing,
the flashbacks everything..... it all really didn't mean a hell of a lot?"
Angie said.
"That's true!" smiled Paul.
"But," smiled Ethan, "It did show you were cool
at school!"
"WELL!" Angie said, "IF you don't mind I'm going
home. Those days are over, there is a nicer, more sweeter gentler Angie
now!" and she laughed manically before beaming away.
"Are you allright Malia?" asked Ghost.
"Yeah the blood pouring out of me will stop soon!"
"WELL it's been a long day and I'm tired. LEt's
get drunk!" smiled Carla.
"OHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" squealed Blake grabbing a few
bottles of everything, "Let's go!" and so the gang got drunk and had one
of the best nights of their lives........................
THE END
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